Imagine a gender equal world. A world free of bias, stereotypes and discrimination. A world that’s diverse, equitable, and inclusive. A world where difference is valued and celebrated. Together we can forge women’s equality. Collectively we can all #BreakTheBias.
In an evolving world where girls and women are changing, boys and men need to change too. For at least two generations now – especially in urban India and educated middleclass families – we have raised our girls to be confident and fight for their rights. However, we seem to have ignored an entire generation of boys who were not told anything about how their sisters were changing. While we gave our daughters new ideals and role models, no one bothered to tell their brothers that they ought to change too! Girls drive two-wheelers and cars. It is considered an essential life skill. You can often hear dads proudly proclaiming that their daughters can drive very well indeed, and they don’t need a father/husband/brother to take them anywhere. However, boys were never taught that cooking is an essential life skill. You don’t see parents proudly saying that their son can cook and doesn’t need a mother/wife/sister to feed him (and keep him alive!). We don’t tell our sons that it is okay for them to be paid less than their wives or stay at home to take care of the kids while their spouses continue to work. Men want to marry a working woman (in theory) but are completely unprepared for the practical reality of a marriage where both partners work. It means doing the dishes or supervising the maid when your wife has a report to complete, it means taking half the day off to take care of your sick son because your wife has an important presentation.
It may even mean giving up a promotion or moving to a new city for your spouse’s career.
Because we don’t tell our sons all this, they continue to expect that their wife will automatically give up the job/promotion/transfer in favor of the family whereas they will never have to take a step back from their own careers. Boys are still raised the way they were for the last many generations. Women are upset that dinner – and the house, kids, in-laws, maid – is still their responsibility while the men don’t know what they did wrong. After all, they *‘allow’* their wives to work, what more do they want?
*Let us not only empower women, but also prepare men to set their expectations right*.
When people see you as a strong woman, they think that you do not need anything or anyone, you can bear everything and will overcome whatever happens. That you do not mind listening to their problems, caring for them or making the decisions and implementing/executing them. When they see you as a strong woman, they just look for you to help them carry their crosses. They talk to you, and they think that you do not need to be heard.
A strong woman is not asked if she is tired, suffering or falling, if she has anxiety or fear. The important thing is that she is always there: A lighthouse in the fog or a rock in the middle of the sea. The strong woman is not forgiven anything. If she loses control, she becomes weak. If she loses her temper, she becomes hysterical.
When the strong woman disappears a minute, it is immediately noticeable, but when she is there, her presence is just taken for granted. The strength that is needed every day, to be that kind of woman is not appreciated by
anyone. Recognize, Respect, Appreciate and Thank the strong women in your life because they also need to be cared for, pampered, and loved. Let us together celebrate women.
ANISA PADARIA
A dedicated altruist to the core, Anisa is a trained psychotherapist and counselor with over a decade of experience. She has been instrumental in shaping personalities of over 2000 individuals including students, young adults, professionals, businessmen, home-makers and the elderly. Anisa has conducted several workshops on Image building and enhancement for young girls, professional women and corporate heads. Her exemplary skills in reading personality traits via their handwriting has been revelation. Her passion is to create a positive impact on human relationships. She revels in mentoring and coaching children to be compassionate, confident and
competent individuals. She has a teaching experience of 25 years with the last 18 years at the prestigious Bombay Scottish School. Anisa has a post-graduation in ECCE and is a trained educator for children with learning disabilities.
Currently, her role as a Zengagist @ Zengage Life 2.0 is bringing about individual enrichment via
exciting Zengagement programs aimed at building a HAPPY society.
Anisa is the Founder and the Soul of Zengage Life 2.0 and bring in a positive change.
Author of the Book Zengage Life 2.0
